Raising a child
Your parents gave you life, but does their tasks end there? ? Do you realise, that parental responsibilities go even further. You are watching your friends and colleagues, you are meeting their parents. In a group of friends you are probably talking about your parents, about their relationship to you - the young. You see the differences in their behavior. Do you like everything ? What is essential in relation to : parents - children ?
Parents' tasks
Before concluding the sacrament of marriage, the priest asks the newlyweds : ,,Are you ready to take offspring, which God will give you, and educate them according to the law of Christ and His Church ?”These words remind spouses, that God calls them not only to transmit life, but also to raise children.
Parents are the child's first and main educators. Because in the family, he spends the first years of his life. Parents take care of his physical development, they are concerned about his health, hygiene and food.
In the family, the child also develops mentally. Learns the mother tongue, he lives with his siblings, meets with relatives and friends, gets to know its surroundings, and thus acquires more and more information about people and the world. Parents also teach the child, how to act in specific life situations. The atmosphere of the family home and the behavior of family members develop honesty in the child, truthfulness, justice, love etc., which are necessary to live in society. This is what parents teach by their own example.
“It is up to the parents to create such a family atmosphere, imbued with love and respect for God and people, that it favors the entire personal and social upbringing of children. That is why the family is the first school of social virtues " (TELL 3).
In a family, a child meets another person for the first time. He learns to get along with others : obey your parents, understanding siblings, true love of neighbor. The family "introduces them slowly into the civic human community and into the People of God" (TELL 3).
When the parents brought their child to be baptized, they heard the priest's words : “Asking for baptism for my children, you take on your responsibility to educate them in faith, that they may love God by keeping God's commandments, neighbor, as Jesus Christ taught us ". They were then asked a question : “Are you aware of this duty ?” (New Rite of Baptism). The godparents are witnesses of the commitment, who are supposed to help parents raise their child. In the sacrament of baptism, the child received the life of God. Christ entrusts his development to the care and vigilance of his parents. From the father and mother, the child accepts faith in God. They teach them to pray by word and example of their own lives, the truths of faith, love of God and people. Parents spend liturgical holidays together with their children, lead them to the church, prepare for the sacraments of St..
Religious education covers the entire life of a child. It shapes his attitude that is open to God and other people. A necessary condition for upbringing is constant dialogue between parents and children. Baby from the moment, when his mental life awakens in him, raises a lot of questions. It requires constant answers. Parents need to spend a lot of time and be patient with him.
Over the years, new and more difficult problems come. They should be the subject of frank discussions between parents and adolescent children. A wise son and daughter will sincerely consult their parents knowingly, that they are of the right age, experience and wish them the best. In this dialogue, the ability to listen and properly understand another person is also an important issue.
Your participation in upbringing
You live and grow up in your family from an early age. You've always been dependent on your parents. 'Today you feel more and more independent. You want to decide for yourself. Meanwhile, your parents continue to instruct you, pay attention and demand obedience. At times like these, you may feel hurt, you are indignant and you rebel. Perhaps, that you feel embittered and think badly of your parents, you are not respectful of them.
And yet, when you think about it, you discover it yourself many times, that they want your good, that they love you and in many cases they were right. remember, that at your age, almost everyone faces similar difficulties in finding a common language with their parents. You just grow. There is also a disagreement between the older and younger generations. One thing is important, so that you can understand yourself, and even more so parents, and found the right solution with them.
You are willing and often in a group of colleagues. You accept their opinion without resistance and sometimes uncritically. On the other hand, you leave the house under any guise. When your parents ask for your help, you answer : I have no time. You have a grudge against your parents. And can't your parents justly blame you ?
You have a friend. You like talking to her. You find a common language with her, maybe you invite to your home. You talk to your friend about it, and did you have the courage, to talk honestly with your parents about it ? Against this background, many misunderstandings and regrets can also arise.
You like to dress fashionably like your colleagues and peers. You don't want to be different from them. Your parents, on the other hand, may have a slightly different opinion. Is fashion that important?, that there must be sharp tensions and misunderstandings against this background ? You tell your parents about your plans for the future. You think, that you dreamed up the perfect job for yourself. But parents have different, more specific and modest plans. And another quarrel.
And so, on many other things, your parents' opinion may differ from yours, e.g.. on smoking or drinking alcoholic beverages. It seems to you, that you are right. You are young after all, so "contemporary". You are used to judging, that that, what's newest and freshest, it's the best. Your parents are "non-contemporary" in your opinion, they have outdated views, they don't know life today. But do you have several dozen years of experience behind you?, they have ? Do their opinion on matters relating to the way of life, profession, people's judgment is less mature than yours ?
In all these difficult situations, your personality is shaped. Raising up is not only the work of your parents, but also yours.
Man is not born into a perfect world. His personality is shaped by solving the difficulties of everyday life. Sometimes, after a disagreement in your home, you imagine, that someday you will solve similar situations in your future family. And yet this is how you will solve them, how do you prepare for it now.
How will I answer God ?
Listen, what do the scriptures say about family life. :
"Guard, son, father's orders, do not despise the mother's teaching, engrave it in your heart forever and hang it around your neck. When you go, let them guide you ; watch over you, when you fall asleep ; when you wake up - they talk to you ; for the lamp is the command, and the light of the law, way of life - admonition, nagana ” (Ex 6, 20-23).
Are you trying to understand your parents in their efforts to get you? ? How do you behave in the event of misunderstandings ? Are you trying to be calm, composed and really fair ? Can you calmly listen to your parents' different opinion ?
■ Think :
1. Jakie zadanie rodziców przypominają obrzędy sakramentu chrztu i sakramentu małżeństwa ?
2. Dlaczego życie w rodzinie nazywamy szkołą życia ?
3. Co w tej szkole życia czynią rodzice — a co dzieci ?
4. Na jakim tle w twoim wieku mogą powstawać nieporozumienia w rodzinie ?
5. Jakie znaczenie dla ciebie ma rozsądne rozwiązywanie zaistniałych nieporozumień ?
■ Remember :
9. Do czego Bóg powołuje rodziców ?
God calls parents to bear and educate their children.
10. Do czego zmierza chrześcijańskie wychowanie dziecka w rodzinie ? Christian upbringing of a child in a family aims at the full development of God's life in him and proper coexistence with his neighbors.
■ Task :
1. Think and write, how parents should deal with their children and discuss it with someone, who you trust.
2. Jakie dostrzegasz błędy u współczesnej młodzieży i jakie widzisz środki zaradcze ?